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Recent News Aggregator Headlines

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Interalliance

   Steel Phoenix Command Advises Callers That Their Mass Avian Sacrifice Day Jokes Are Not Original and All Bomb Threats Will Be Investigated [22 November 2318] (ISN)

AEU

   Pilot Constantine Stone Finishes Payment of Voluntary Reparations For His Part in New Phoenix Starship Crash Tragedy [ 1 November 2318] (NEN)

EAOS

   Technicians Rush to Contain Bari Biohazard on Torus After Starship "And Peggy" Thoughtfully Spreads Spores from Dock to Dock [16 November 2318] (ESR)

Fringe

   Retired Confederation Civilian Pilot Donates All Career Funds To Provisional Committee; No Time For Interview As She Intends To Work On Ground To Support Government Plans [ 9 June 2318] (CPC)

League

   Inhabitants Of Small Island On Old Earth Burn Effigies Of 17th Century Man To Celebrate Failure To Fix Government [ 5 November 2318] (ENN)

Mutuality

   A Battered and Bloody Edouard Gagnon (Except For Five Teeth Which Are Quite Missing) Returns Home Clutching Schematics to Triumphant Fanfare, Complimentary Poutine, Complimentary Cardiovascular Union Benefits [ 3 November 2318] (DFP)

Economy

   Star Warriors to Focus Test New Peanut Butter Starship Carpeting for Superior Deck Grip [25 October 2318] (EFX)

Sports

   Captain Goodboy Shatters Glass Ceiling, Allowed to Enter Competitive Tea-Drinking Championship [14 July 2318] (USN)

Entertainment

   The Lost Colonies: Dr. Mizushima Applies for Permit Extension to Investigate Antispinward Unaffiliated Peoples [ 7 November 2318] (TPR)

Tabloid

   Potentially Drunken Pilot Attempts Takeover of Hovertaxi [30 October 2318] (SSX)

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